Last month, my daughter and I were driving through town after several severe storms had moved through Maryland. As we passed one neighborhood, we noticed a large tree had fallen into someone's front yard. A tree company was there cutting it up to remove it. Next door, an older gentleman had brought out a lawn chair and was sitting in his yard watching the process.
My fifteen-year-old daughter's immediate reaction was, "Aww, Mom. That poor man. He has nothing better to do."
But I saw something different. Here was someone who had the space, the time, and the luxury to simply be—to watch what was happening around him, take it in, and enjoy the experience. He had the freedom to sit outside on a beautiful afternoon without feeling like he should be somewhere else. The freedom to experience life instead of rushing to the next thing.
It made me think about a reset exercise I do twice a year where I ask myself a series of questions. One of them is:
What do I want more of in my life?
My answer is almost always the same: more peace, more margin in my calendar, more time to think, and more moments where I can simply be instead of constantly doing.
Seeing that older gentleman reminded me of something I think many of us are craving, especially during busy seasons of life. There's something appealing about having the freedom to simply pause and notice what's happening around us. To truly enjoy nature, watch a butterfly, or listen to the birds.
I think that's what so many high achievers are really longing for. We still want to grow, achieve, and get results. But we’re also longing for the freedom to pursue those things without feeling like every minute must be filled. We want enough space to think, recharge, and enjoy the life we're working so hard to create.
As leaders, that kind of space isn't just good for us personally, it's good for our leadership. Some of our best thinking doesn't happen when we're rushing from meeting to meeting. It happens when our minds finally have enough room to process, reflect, and connect ideas. That's when we gain perspective and see solutions we couldn't see before.
This is hard for high achievers. We're wired to improve. We read books, listen to podcasts, attend conferences, invest in leadership programs, and look for ways to become more productive, build stronger teams, communicate more effectively, and achieve better results.
Growth matters, and I believe lifelong learning is one of the greatest investments we can make. But somewhere along the way, many of us begin to equate constant activity with effectiveness.
We fill every open space on our calendars because it feels productive. We move from meeting to meeting, email to email, project to project, believing that staying busy is what exceptional leaders do. The problem is that constant activity leaves very little room for what leaders actually need most: clear thinking.
Instead of leading proactively, we spend our days responding. We have less capacity to think strategically, anticipate challenges, connect ideas, or see the bigger picture because we're consumed by what's directly in front of us. I've also found that leaders who never slow down don't just burn themselves out, they often burn out their teams as well. When everything feels urgent to the leader, it eventually feels urgent to everyone else. Teams begin operating in a constant state of reaction, with little opportunity to pause, improve, or think beyond today's demands. Before long, everyone is exhausted.
I believe one of the most undervalued leadership practices is creating space to think.
The most important work of leadership isn't always about doing more or executing faster. It often happens when we have enough mental space to step back, reflect, ask better questions, and think strategically about what's ahead. The strongest leaders aren't necessarily the busiest. They're the ones who intentionally create enough margin to gain perspective and make thoughtful decisions. They understand that reflection isn't a luxury—it's an essential leadership skill that leads to better decisions and, ultimately, better results.
Creating space isn't about being less ambitious. It's about recognizing that some of our most important leadership work doesn't happen while we're doing, it happens while we're thinking.
Some of my best ideas have come while I'm on a walk, on vacation, or even in the shower. Those ideas rarely come while I'm answering emails or sitting in back-to-back meetings. Our minds need time to process what we've experienced, and during the normal rhythm of meetings, emails, decisions, and projects, we're in execution mode. It's only when we create a little breathing room that we're able to connect ideas, gain perspective, and see possibilities we couldn't see before.
Maybe that's part of what I admired about the older gentleman sitting in his lawn chair that afternoon. Not because he had nothing to do, but because, in that moment, he seemed to have something many of us are craving: the freedom to pause.
As high achievers, we still want to grow, make an impact, and do meaningful work. But I also think we're longing for a little more margin. To think, to recharge, and to enjoy the life we're working so hard to build.
That's the real value of creating margin. It helps us become more thoughtful leaders. But it also reminds us that life isn't measured only by what we accomplish. It's also measured by enjoying the journey along the way.
I really love and enjoy this reading. Reading this I learned that when you speak out clearly you thoughts and ideas people see you as winner, because you are not afraid to go straight to the point.
Great article.....And happy belated birthday! Welcome to my world, young lady!
Whenever I have a work project that I keep putting off - I think about delegating that project to someone else - which accomplishes 2 things- it gets the project done and frees us my brain space thinking about it.
Good morning. I loved this read. Thank you so much for sharing. Sincerely, Melissa :)
Thank you for this blog Laurie. I liked most part and specially "As organizations have become more complex, there is a tendency to require employees to do more with less. This is a slippery slope, and often can result in employees feeling overwhelmed and burnt out. One of the biggest contributors to this is not evaluating resources during the strategic planning process." I will use this practice "A best practice is to do what I call Priority Planning—putting important practices on your calendar ahead of time so they become a priority in your day. Examples of activities to Priority Plan include scheduling recurring coaching sessions with each team member, time for strategic thinking and planning, vacations, doctor appointments, important children’s events, and blocks of time for focused work on projects." To be more effective, I will get a good rest so I can have enough energy in the morning. I will read the blog again along with the other links on employee evaluation. Thank you so much Laurie. Best wishes to you and your family.
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I love the feedback on the more than 50 hours of work. AND filling time. So true. Unfortunately, showing that you work longer hours is still seen as being a "hard worker" - not sure how to change that though.
I enjoyed the read. I concur that transitioning from technical skills to delegating results was a task within itself. I did not realize I was almost trying to do the same thing from my previous position, and it was not working. However, I am seeing the results of how delegating daily tasks makes my job and workload easier. Thank you, Laurie.
Thank you for sharing information about your trip Laurie! All 3 things resonate with me - probably #1 being the biggest. I know when I'm gone for a week, I'm still thinking about work and need a vacation when I get back because I did not relax enough. I think your idea of a longer vacation is definitely in my future!!
Hey Laurie, My take on your list - 1 - everyone has a story - listen 2- social media causes interpersonal problems 5- generational differences create hurdles / earn it you aren't entitled / we should help them get there not give it to them 6 AMEN some leaders I would have followed thru Hell, some I wish - well, you know 7- true BUT be as good as your word and 14- Hopefully we leave some good from our efforts, I know the good leaders I have had have. Seen a lot in my career but it really comes down to treat others the way you want to be treated, fair, honest, and straight forward. Good read. Take care
I love this so much and thank you so much for sharing! I really just love realizing that enjoying the simple things sometimes is the best! Also recognizing that what is important and fun to you may not be everyone else's fun on the on the trip. “Do we get to keep these toiletries?” was my favorite!!!! :):) Glad you had a great time and got to spend it with your family!
I very much resonate with lesson no 3! Thank you Laurie
I think the part that you might have missed in their top 5 things, some of which were not "Italian" or even different from home, all of them happened with you, both of you. And i think that is what they will remember too. And you've got tons of photos that will remind them of what the Sistine Chapel looked like - then they might remember what it sounded like or smelled like. Oh- and i agree with you 100% about sleep!
LOTS of great take-aways from this post! Thank you for posting! I especially love "slow down to speed up". That's a keeper!
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the not getting enough rest to be at my best. definitely need to get more quality sleep and make that a priority
It really is hard to narrow down the 3 lessons into one because they are all so interconnected. You need to give your mind and body THE TIME to relax SO THAT you can enjoy the SIMPLE THINGS, including REST. I enjoyed that lesson as a whole. I will take that lesson with me on my next vacation (or staycation). As always, thank you Laurie for your candor and for sharing your own lessons with others so that we too can benefit.
Great information and reminders
Laurie, Thank you for sharing your trip and these nuggets. The lessons that resonate most with me are it does take time to relax and getting proper rest. When you devote 15 plus hours of your day for work, taking care of home and others; the 6-7 hours you lay down does not cut it! For me during this time I'm trying to unwind and find myself thinking fighting not to think about what I have to do tomorrow. Even after I create a to do list for the next day...I find things I need to add. Taking a day off here and there doesn't cut it as well because of all the plans you have for that day. I try to make sure my Mental Health Days remains just that.... time for me to laugh, cry, scream.... whatever I need to release the cares and stress!
Really enjoyed the article... and all very true!
Since I was already well aware of #1 (I'm in the same boat with taking a long time to relax), I think I'm resonating most with #3. I'm learning to prioritize sleep / rest and it's been wonderful. Love that you said "I love sleep.". :)
Welcome back from vacation. Well deserve! Action is the key to success. Shoulder to shoulder, coaching and delegating task to help other employees grow are very important. It is a sacrifice that one must do. Forget about yourself and be with your team day in and out to help them grow, is not always easy. On the long run, your team is stronger, and you can depend on them for the success of the organization. Thank you so much!
So many great tips here, thank you!
I am so impressed you're able to disconnect and these are great tips I'll be sure to try on my next trip!
Such a great post - so inspiring!