A few weeks ago, I had to have a tough conversation with my oldest daughter. She’d been asking for a phone, and while we initially considered a basic model with limited features, we ultimately decided to hold off. It wasn’t an easy decision. A lot of kids her age already have phones, and even though some of her classmates don’t, she was understandably disappointed. In some ways it would have been easier to give in, but we knew that waiting was the right choice for our family.
That experience reminded me of the kind of decisions leaders face every day. Whether at home or at work, leadership often requires choosing the harder, longer-term path over the quick or convenient one. Strong leaders recognize that their role is to prioritize what’s best for the team and the organization—even when that means making decisions that won’t be popular. They don’t shy away from discomfort or default to the easier path. Instead, they lead with courage, knowing that real leadership means doing what’s right, not just what’s easy.
That conversation with my daughter was a reminder of a universal leadership truth: sometimes the right choice is the hard one. And while the context may differ, the principles are the same.
Here are three ways this shows up in leadership, and why the ability to make tough, values-driven decisions is essential to building trust, credibility, and a high-performing team:
1. Leadership Means Choosing Long-Term Impact Over Short-Term Comfort
It’s tempting to avoid tough decisions in the moment— whether it’s overlooking underperformance to avoid conflict, holding off on a necessary restructure, or sticking with the status quo to keep the peace. But leadership isn’t about comfort; it’s about clarity. When leaders consistently make decisions based on what will serve the team, credit union, and mission in the long run, even if it’s unpopular, they build trust, consistency, and a stronger foundation. Avoiding challenging conversations and decisions only compounds issues and creates misalignment.
2. Avoiding Discomfort Undermines Leadership
Many leaders fall into the trap of people-pleasing or conflict avoidance. But avoiding discomfort usually leads to bigger issues later—burnout, disengagement, and misalignment. Leadership requires being able to sit in that tension, knowing that hard conversations and decisions are part of the job. For example, giving honest feedback to a team member who is underperforming to help them learn and grow may be uncomfortable, but it’s necessary for their personal performance, and the performance of the entire team. When leaders model this courage, they give others permission to face challenges directly too.
3. Consistency Builds Credibility
Leadership is built in the everyday actions and interactions. When leaders consistently make thoughtful, principled decisions, even the difficult ones, they demonstrate reliability and integrity in action. Their team learns they can be trusted to lead with fairness and purpose. Over time, this builds credibility and trust. Team members may not always agree with every decision, but they’ll respect a leader who is consistent, fair, and guided by something deeper than convenience or popularity. In addition, inconsistency erodes trust fast. If you avoid challenging moments, decisions, and conversations, your team becomes frustrated and disengaged. Steady leadership, especially in uncomfortable moments, creates psychological safety and a strong foundation for performance.
We came close to giving in and getting my daughter a phone. Sometimes it’s easier to do what everyone else is doing rather than stand your ground. Even though I had reservations, I found myself leaning toward saying yes—because, in the short term, it would have made things easier. No more complaints about being one of the only kids in her friend group without one. No more negotiating every time the topic came up. And no more judgments from others who thought we were hurting her more by not giving her a phone, because she would feel left out.
But deep down, I knew that decision would bring a different set of challenges. Helping her stay focused during a demanding school year. Managing screen time during our family vacation. Worrying about the long-term impact of introducing a powerful distraction at a time when her brain is still developing.
In the end, I had to quiet the noise—her disappointment, my own discomfort, and the pressure to do what everyone else was doing—and come back to what matters most for our family. Leadership, like parenting, isn’t about choosing what feels good in the moment. It’s about making choices that align with your values, even when they’re hard. And sometimes, the most loving or effective decision is the one that takes the most courage.
I really love and enjoy this reading. Reading this I learned that when you speak out clearly you thoughts and ideas people see you as winner, because you are not afraid to go straight to the point.
Great article.....And happy belated birthday! Welcome to my world, young lady!
Whenever I have a work project that I keep putting off - I think about delegating that project to someone else - which accomplishes 2 things- it gets the project done and frees us my brain space thinking about it.
Good morning. I loved this read. Thank you so much for sharing. Sincerely, Melissa :)
Thank you for this blog Laurie. I liked most part and specially "As organizations have become more complex, there is a tendency to require employees to do more with less. This is a slippery slope, and often can result in employees feeling overwhelmed and burnt out. One of the biggest contributors to this is not evaluating resources during the strategic planning process." I will use this practice "A best practice is to do what I call Priority Planning—putting important practices on your calendar ahead of time so they become a priority in your day. Examples of activities to Priority Plan include scheduling recurring coaching sessions with each team member, time for strategic thinking and planning, vacations, doctor appointments, important children’s events, and blocks of time for focused work on projects." To be more effective, I will get a good rest so I can have enough energy in the morning. I will read the blog again along with the other links on employee evaluation. Thank you so much Laurie. Best wishes to you and your family.
this is a test comment
...
I love the feedback on the more than 50 hours of work. AND filling time. So true. Unfortunately, showing that you work longer hours is still seen as being a "hard worker" - not sure how to change that though.
I enjoyed the read. I concur that transitioning from technical skills to delegating results was a task within itself. I did not realize I was almost trying to do the same thing from my previous position, and it was not working. However, I am seeing the results of how delegating daily tasks makes my job and workload easier. Thank you, Laurie.
Thank you for sharing information about your trip Laurie! All 3 things resonate with me - probably #1 being the biggest. I know when I'm gone for a week, I'm still thinking about work and need a vacation when I get back because I did not relax enough. I think your idea of a longer vacation is definitely in my future!!
Hey Laurie, My take on your list - 1 - everyone has a story - listen 2- social media causes interpersonal problems 5- generational differences create hurdles / earn it you aren't entitled / we should help them get there not give it to them 6 AMEN some leaders I would have followed thru Hell, some I wish - well, you know 7- true BUT be as good as your word and 14- Hopefully we leave some good from our efforts, I know the good leaders I have had have. Seen a lot in my career but it really comes down to treat others the way you want to be treated, fair, honest, and straight forward. Good read. Take care
I love this so much and thank you so much for sharing! I really just love realizing that enjoying the simple things sometimes is the best! Also recognizing that what is important and fun to you may not be everyone else's fun on the on the trip. “Do we get to keep these toiletries?” was my favorite!!!! :):) Glad you had a great time and got to spend it with your family!
I very much resonate with lesson no 3! Thank you Laurie
I think the part that you might have missed in their top 5 things, some of which were not "Italian" or even different from home, all of them happened with you, both of you. And i think that is what they will remember too. And you've got tons of photos that will remind them of what the Sistine Chapel looked like - then they might remember what it sounded like or smelled like. Oh- and i agree with you 100% about sleep!
LOTS of great take-aways from this post! Thank you for posting! I especially love "slow down to speed up". That's a keeper!
testing blog comment flow
the not getting enough rest to be at my best. definitely need to get more quality sleep and make that a priority
It really is hard to narrow down the 3 lessons into one because they are all so interconnected. You need to give your mind and body THE TIME to relax SO THAT you can enjoy the SIMPLE THINGS, including REST. I enjoyed that lesson as a whole. I will take that lesson with me on my next vacation (or staycation). As always, thank you Laurie for your candor and for sharing your own lessons with others so that we too can benefit.
Great information and reminders
Laurie, Thank you for sharing your trip and these nuggets. The lessons that resonate most with me are it does take time to relax and getting proper rest. When you devote 15 plus hours of your day for work, taking care of home and others; the 6-7 hours you lay down does not cut it! For me during this time I'm trying to unwind and find myself thinking fighting not to think about what I have to do tomorrow. Even after I create a to do list for the next day...I find things I need to add. Taking a day off here and there doesn't cut it as well because of all the plans you have for that day. I try to make sure my Mental Health Days remains just that.... time for me to laugh, cry, scream.... whatever I need to release the cares and stress!
Really enjoyed the article... and all very true!
Since I was already well aware of #1 (I'm in the same boat with taking a long time to relax), I think I'm resonating most with #3. I'm learning to prioritize sleep / rest and it's been wonderful. Love that you said "I love sleep.". :)
Welcome back from vacation. Well deserve! Action is the key to success. Shoulder to shoulder, coaching and delegating task to help other employees grow are very important. It is a sacrifice that one must do. Forget about yourself and be with your team day in and out to help them grow, is not always easy. On the long run, your team is stronger, and you can depend on them for the success of the organization. Thank you so much!
So many great tips here, thank you!
I am so impressed you're able to disconnect and these are great tips I'll be sure to try on my next trip!
Such a great post - so inspiring!